Feminist Reflections is a feature I created on my blog to share my personal thoughts.
It is alright for a woman to hit a man?
NO. My URL is called Feminist Reflections.
It's actually derived from my instagram Femme Fatale. Am I a feminist though? To some extent, I am because I like to be independent, I like to empower other women and MEN, and I do not want mistreatment of women and MEN. I would like being equal to a man, but it's fine if I'm not. I don't exactly fully support the cause of feminism though. I don't fight for equality for women only rather I fight against mistreatment for BOTH genders which includes intersex people. The actual cause of feminism is a bit strange, because you're seeking equality for only women, what about men? It contradicts the whole cause of "equality." It is a good cause, but I believe it's incomplete. I like taking Feminist Reflections to a more higher level where feminism acknowledges both genders equally :) You readers are probably aware of how much I speak against mistreatment of women such as, this post.
Scenario 1: A woman gets hit by a man. Almost everyone declares that is abuse and the male is violent.
Scenario 2: A man gets hit by a woman. Almost everyone declares it was the man's fault, he must be harassing her.
THAT'S NOT FAIR.
Here are some examples in books where this trend is going.
Bottom line: If it's not self-defense or some kind of duel, then you don't have any place to hit a man just as it's not a man's place to hit a woman. If a woman fights against double standards, just don't contradict yourself because it's hypocritical. It doesn't make you a "strong woman" when you hit a man, in my eyes, that's rather pathetic and violent because you know most likely he won't hit you back. It makes you strong when you have patience and respect the other human being. I don't accept this behavior in men, and neither do I accept it in women. Abuse is abuse whether it's from a man or a woman. You have to give respect in order to get respect.
Have you guys noticed abuse on men before whether in books or reality? What's your take on it?
Shukran for reading this! Leave your blog links in the comments & I'll be sure to check them out & drop by :) Stay in tuned pretty creatures..
“Above all, be the heroine of your life, not the victim.” —Nora Ephron
femmmefatalee@gmail.com
I agree, Benish, I don't think it's okay for a woman to hit a man. That shows a complete lack of respect, and also takes away from any reasonable argument. You said it well, you have to give respect to get it. Great post here! :)
ReplyDeleteThank you Rachel ♥
DeleteI would agree with you Benish. I don't think it is alright for women to go around hitting men either. When people ask me if I am a feminist myself I never know what to say. And one of those reasons is because of the double standards you mention. Yes, some people support feminism the right way, but some people I know haven't been supporting the equality the right way. A thought-provoking post indeed ;)
ReplyDeleteI'm glad you could agree Olivia! I understand what you mean, the double standards are quite hypocritical. Thank you :)
DeleteI honestly don't think it is right to ever hit a person period. Unless of course it is self defense. But just out of anger is so very wrong. :(
ReplyDeleteYes, it's very wrong. It's sad to see people still abuse each other.
DeleteI'm with Ali. Hitting another person is NEVER okay unless its self defense. It's not something I've thought of before, because I think we are sort of "brain washed" to only see violence against women, especially. This is very thought provoking, Benish!
ReplyDeleteGreat post!
Thank you Nick! & I know, not many people I know have brought it before so wallah I decided to make a post on it :)
DeleteYou raise some excellent points I guess I have never sat down and thought about it, but you are right. If a woman hits a man it is wrong unless it is self defense. We as a society need to recognize that. Thanks for posting this.
ReplyDeleteThank you for agreeing Heidi ♥ I'm glad so many of you could agree with it :)
DeleteWonderful and insightful post. I agree, a woman should never hit a man unless it is self defense, as Heidi said above me. And the same for a man.
ReplyDelete:)
Thank you Magen ♥
DeleteGreat post. It's sad how often you see men get abused but society is ok with it because they are not the "weaker" sex. Like being a tough, manly man means you like getting abused.
ReplyDeleteDreams @ Once Upon A Dream Books
I'm so glad you could agree! ♥
DeleteI feel like in the spirit of feminism it often goes too far and is more pro-female an not about equality anymore. I totally agree with you and think the double standard needs to disapear. Indeed women abuse is bad, but men abuse is also bad. Great post and I am happy to hear more people think this way and are for real equality and I like the way you describe it as taking it to a higher level and being for both sexes. I luckily haven't read many books were abuse of that kind took place or people hit each other and I agree that it isn't strong to hit someone, there is never a good reason to hit someone except in self defense.
ReplyDeleteYes, that is actually so true nowadays. It's more about just female rights now, and the double standards for men are there now which is just pretty sad. Thank you for sharing your thoughts Lola ♥
DeleteInteresting post! I agree, I don't think abuse towards men should be so easily dismissed.
ReplyDeleteYes, I wish there was more awareness of it, a lot of people just brush it off.
DeleteI don't agree with the double standard at all but I think the reason brush off the women hitting men is because of another stereotype that women are weak and they won't do damage. Obviously, this isn't the case and I'm with you. People shouldn't hit others at all. Gosh, it isn't third grade. Have a little respect, right?
ReplyDeleteGreat post!
Yes, thank you Nova! I'm glad you could agree! ♥ It's all about respect.
DeleteThis is such a smart post, Benish :) Lovely! There's this video in YouTube where a man and a woman (who are acting as fake couples) actually FIGHT in public. When the man hit the woman, everyone immediately jumped on the guy, but when it was otherwise, everyone just watched the girl, thinking that she must have been harassed or something.
ReplyDeleteTruthfully, I barely even see a man get abused, through books or reality :( I don't know why, but even when i do, it's always because the guy is the one who harasses the girl. So while I completely agree with you that both man and woman have to be respected, I don't know what to feel in a book when a man is the one who gets hurt because in books, the guy is always doing something wrong :/
THESE are things people lack understanding on. thanks for sharing
ReplyDeletehttp://melodyjacob1.blogspot.com/
No problem ♥
DeleteIt's never okay to hit someone, man or woman, unless it's 100% self-defense and you fear for your life.
ReplyDeleteI agree with you ♥
DeleteI love this post! I whole heartedly agree. It is never okay to hurt anyone...period! It doesnmt matter if you're male or female. I've always been bothered when I see women on TV throwing things at them. Things that can potentially really hurt that person. If that situation's in reverse, it's called abuse..so why should iy be okay if a woman does that to a man? For me, it's pretty much in league of the mentality than when guys sleep around, they're studs but for women, they're sluts.
ReplyDeleteThank you for agreeing Amir! ♥ & I agree, violence isn't acceptable from men or women. The double standards are rather weird, it's sad no one gives much concern to a man being abused by a woman.
DeleteThere are a very different points of view on feminism. Some radical feminists I believe just dislike men and other, true feminist don't - they just want equality.
ReplyDeleteI actually used to hit my friends that were boys. My mom always used to do this with my dad, her sisters, and brother when they were near and she found something funny. She would hit them on their thigh without meaning to hurt them or anything. There is just a reaction I think my mom and I started having a habit of. I didn't like that I did that without even thinking so I stopped. It's not right to hit men. I understand why in some situations where a woman might not understand that it's wrong, but once you do you need to stop. I think young girls should be taught just like young boys that they don't hit each other. Boys should also learn that they shouldn't hit other boys not just girls and girls should learn not to hit anyone too. It's just not something that is enforced with girls and that needs to change.
I''ve never paid attention to abuse to guys in books. I completely missed it with The DUFF. Also, I wanted to get your take on playful hitting. Do you think that's okay or that it'll eventually get more physical?
Thank you for sharing your thoughts Adriana <3 I had this discussion from a classmate once in my class. He told me once his fiance and him use to play fight, but they don't anymore. He mentioned he meant to hit her lightly when they were play fighting but his hand actually landed hard when he didn't mean too, technically play fighting I believe is a bit wrong too. It might seem harmless, but it can lead to more physicality and cause actual damage and abuse.
DeleteTrue feminism wants to obtain equality for ALL genders, for ALL people, regardless of race, age, sexuality, etc. This is what true feminism is to me - it's not something that is exclusive to a gender only. I've seen a lot of misguided feminists out there - I applaud their passion, I do, but I do question those who are so extreme in finding faults in other genders while doing things against them that are contradictory to what they believe. Alas, that is a discussion for another day.
ReplyDeleteAs for this one, I absolutely agree. It's wrong to hurt another person without just cause, period. Men shouldn't women. Women shouldn't hit men. Nobody should hit each other. I was particularly bothered by this in The Graceling when the MC was very... abusive to her partner, who she punched and beat up once because she was so angry at him. And he was such a sweetie pie too and I really couldn't fathom why she had to do that.
Faye at The Social Potato
I couldn't have said it better myself Faye, I agree with everything you have stated! Yes, it is depressing when women think it's okay to hit a man just because they're angry, that's abuse too. It's technically still assault.
DeleteI couldn't agree more with this Benish -> If it's not self-defense or some kind of duel, then you don't have any place to hit a man just as it's not a man's place to hit a woman.
ReplyDeleteI cringe every time I read this in a book, just not on!
A great post! Sharon – Obsession with Books
Thank you Sharon, I'm so glad you could agree! ♥
DeleteI do agree. I think physical abuse OF anyone BY anyone is not okay, ever. I do, however, think there are situations when a woman is in significantly more harm than a male, which is why I think the idea exists that it is somehow worse for a man to hit a woman. That said, it is still NOT okay for a woman to hit people, regardless of gender. It isn't funny, it isn't cute, and it isn't right. Fabulous post!
ReplyDeleteShannon @ It Starts At Midnight
Thank you for sharing your thoughts Shannon, & I agree, it's never really okay to hit someone out of anger regardless of gender.
DeleteIt's pretty much a double standard when it comes to the sexes isn't it. Echoing everyone else, it's never okay to abuse anyone, no justification for not only physically and emotionally as well, which seems to be the type of abuse displayed by women in our reads. Emotional abuse, manipulation, even in YA. I'm not a feminist, but I believe in equality for all. We see and hear so often about women being abused, raped, assaulted. But the truth is, men can also be the victim of a violent partner. The difference is, I think most men probably feel ashamed to speak out which saddens me that anyone would endure any type of abuse. There's no justification for it.
ReplyDeleteReally interesting topic this week Benish, something not often raised <3
I'm glad you think so Kelly, & I agree I haven't read any topics on this so I thought of sharing my own thoughts on it. I'm with you on equality for all, and that is true, men can feel embarrassed about it. It's really underrated.
DeleteI'm so glad that you've covered this topic, and I love how your blog has a prevalent theme of not only feminism and equality. I totally agree, man or woman, that it's not alright to hit them unless it's self defense or anything.
ReplyDeleteThank you so much Jean, I'm glad you think so too <3
DeleteGreat topic overall! This is very unheard of so I'm glad you could raise awareness about it.
ReplyDeleteThank you ♥
DeleteI don't "class" myself as a feminist either, I mean, I want to be equal to anyone, not just a man. I'll fight to be me and not anyone else, and I'll fight for what I think is right, but sexism will exist whether you're a feminist or not.
ReplyDeleteExactly! Some women can be abusive, and I mean, when a women gets abused, they stay quiet because of a whole lot of different reasons. But when a man does? There's a whole lot of embarrassment in there too. I haven't read any where the mans getting abused (I've read a few with women) but considering I mostly read YA it doesn't come up too often.
Yes, that's very true - some men don't want to speak up as well. It's very underrated but it still does happen though which is quite depressing.
Delete