Tuesday, April 1, 2014

Battle of the Genders| Double Standards♥

Tuesday, April 01, 2014

Femme's Reflections is a feature I created on my blog to share my personal reflections.

Hi everyone, hope you're all well ! Thought Id' update my blog with a new post. Thank you for the love as always xo This post is about double standards. These double standards exist comparing men and women. I really hope to expose these standards and together we can make a change ..
Oh, how I hate double standards ..
1) Men are considered more dominant, and women are considered more submissive.

Traditionally, this has been common. Men belong in the outside field and women are supposed to belong to the kitchen. What's wrong with being in a kitchen? That's how you survive smarties! Although, a woman is NOT supposed to be confined to a kitchen. She can make her own choices, and NOT bow down to her husband. You're not supposed to accept defeat in front of human beings anyway. Who are humans to decide one's submissive and one's dominant? I don't mind if the man protects the woman, that's sweet but not every woman needs a saving. These silly One direction songs saying "I'll heal you" or "I'll save you". 

Uhm.. kids you are not even fully mature yet, the only thing you will save is your pretty face. 

You're NOT God to save anyone. 

By the way, Zayn Malik - you are beautiful too, thanks.

2)It's okay for a woman to cry, but a man is considered "soft" or a "sissy" if he does. 

That is so unfair .. If men are sensitive, emotional, or cry, they’re not considered “man enough” in society. What is wrong with crying? Crying is not an emotion only reserved for women since we're "hysterical" and "emotional." I don't understand how women are emotional if they get depressed, why aren't men considered emotional when they get angry? Emotions isn't limited to sadness. You need to re-evaluate your life if you think men are not emotional. 
Don't you know crying is actually good for health? - It releases the stress & chemicals from your body. So men, cry as much as you want. Sensitivity is a nice trait too but don't overdo it. Soft hearted men are the best.

3)A man can speak out about his sexuality, but if a woman does - she is considered promiscuous.

Uhmm .. okay there now. If you can't handle someone else's beliefs about sexuality, then you deserve to spouseless for the rest of your life. Just saying :)
I understand if a woman is outspoken and blunt about who she is, it might put some people off - but would that be your same reaction if it was a man who was that open? Probably not.. Why do these rules apply to women only? Confused world. 

4)In some cultures, women are forbidden from pre-martial intercourse, but men are allowed.


This double standard is one of the dumbest one I ever heard -  tell me about the contradiction right there? Women are forbidden but men are not .. Why aren't BOTH forbidden or BOTH allowed? Stereotyping a woman because of her biological and sociological  factors is stupid, it makes you sound ignorant. 

4) In the media, women have more body shots and are exposed explicitly than men.

If you look at music these videos, it's usually women who prance around with barely any clothes on. A male singer is surrounded by plenty of women all over him. Gross much?? I don't understand how these women agreed to being portrayed like this either.  

It's beyond my understanding.
Robin Thicke is a celebrity who is married. He let a young adult, still a young teenger - Miley Cyrus dance on him in a vulgar way. Miley was hated for this - my question is how was Robin Thicke allowed to get away with this and Miley Cyrus was only judged? I'll answer it. It's okay because he's man and  bad for Miley because she is a woman. The sad truth. 

If she's "immature" then he should have been the mature one to not let such a performance happen. I'm not justifying Miley, she didn't have to dance like that - it rubs off the wrong way, agreed but Robin was no saint either.

5)A woman is intelligent because she's hardworking, a man is intelligent because of his "natural high ability."

This is another dumb one. Men are smart because they're"gifted."

I don't even want to explain this one. All I'll say it, high ability is not about gender. If you're blessed, it's not because you're from the male species.

It's acceptable for a man to have multiple partners since he's the "man" and if a woman does, she is called a "slut." 

Dare to say, I laughed. HA! 
Why isn't there no curse word for a man like that? If you're going to state one thing is wrong for a gender, then do it in the same manner. If it's acceptable for men, then it should be acceptable for women. If it's wrong for women, then it should be wrong for men as well.

These are all extremely important issues because both men and women are stereotyped into believing, they have be a certain kind of person to be accepted in society. People shouldn’t be as narrow-minded andshould  open up to more intriguing ideas. No matter how much society thinks it has advanced, there will be some people who beg differ. This kind of thinking can be changed though communication and different teachings. No one should ever put pressure on a woman or man. 

Men and women should be able to be themselves and express themselves freely without being judged. If people can change their mentality and be more open-minded about gender socialization, these double standards can be gone(This was part of my paper hehe). I'm not being a feminist, only a human being. 

 You can see how flawed these standards are .. applying such rules just because of gender. 
I have been raised in a religious Islamic household where women and men are not considered equal. In Islam, women share some similar aspects as men but they are considered different. It does not say they can be mistreated, but they are considered different because of their feminine physique, emotions, modesty, and hijab. 

I don’t believe women are equal to men; they’re actually better in some ways, and I don’t believe men are superior to women. What women can do, men cannot such as, go through childbirth and labor pain.  

As long as I’m not mistreated by a man, then I’m happy. It's not about equality, it's about treatment. It’s like a competition on who's better, but I just want to be the best for myself and God only and not to prove a point in society.

I rest my case now ..

Loooool thank you for reading my essay, take care everyone ! :)

"Women have always been the strong ones of the world. The men are always seeking from women a little pillow to put their heads down on. They are always longing for the mother who held them as infants." 
- Coco Chanel

With love, Benish Khan.
Personal Instagram @FeministReflections
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  1. I absolutely loved this! You write so well and make really good points - I wish more people were as open minded as you

  2. You have a talent for writing !

    I always come back to check out new poss from yours. Your blog us quite pretty as well ! Simple yet beautiful as you said :)) keep it up xx

    1. Aww thanks so much, glad you like the new layout!

  3. Great post ! You are really funny!

  4. So true! Why can't everyone think this way??????

    1. Aww lol thanks for agreeing! I wish more people would be open minded - it'll be better for all of us.

  5. This is so good. I love all of your points and I agree with them. Especially the intelligence one! I was the smarty pants in school and I was hard working but yet all the boys in the class were gifted.!

    Thanks for sharing and following and have a great week! :)

    Alex @ The Shelf Diaries

    1. Aww, thanks so much! :)

      Some of these double standards are weird, glad you agree though!

  6. I hate the double standard. I think it is silly. Especially in my culture, I feel like it is prevalent in far too many households.
    Bright and Shiny

    1. Agreed, it doesn't even make sense - I hope people change their thinking soon.

  7. I really love your post! This unfortunately so true... Nice writing and work ;)



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